Wednesday, April 30, 2014

dream it, do it - the visual journal reminders





The key to achieving,what you want - whether it's a healthier body or increased confidence - may lie in your ability to visualize it. Here's how to use mental imagery to become stronger, happier, and more effective.
 
 
IMAGINE THAT!
 
 
 
This is my Mind-Way
an opening to Dreams
to quiet and solitude
a place that is needed I can just turn the Key
no matter the noise
the chaos or stress that surrounds
I hold the Key to enter within
to rest my mind if I choose
to put it behind as I enter the door
leave it on the other side
if only for a moment
 
 
 
 
 
A tent canopy in an open field with possibly a large shaded tree
Blankets, a chair, a pallette, fresh air, time and face to the wind
Silence with just songs of the birds or flitters of little flyers buzzing by my head.
All images captured on the canvas before me to hold forever the memory of the moment.
Take that painted dream to a wall of my barn to gaze upon during a morning of lazy pajama'd coffee
Steam to the sunrise and a possible goat bleeping
A walk back to a pillow and bedspread.
Yes... I do dream. - Nikki
 
 
 
 
Inspired by:
MoonHeart by Charles DeLint
and
a friend who led me to this author: Kimberly Morris Ropp
Thank you.
 
 
 
 
Moonheart, by Charles DeLint. “The Way is real, but it has no form. It is attainable by any who dare to follow it, but the journey is long and the rewards cannot be weighed by your present values. First you must attain an inner stillness—attain it and maintain it. Without conscious effort. That is the heart of the Way: inner silence. The old language has a word to describe it: taw. It means the silence that is like music. Strength through harmony. Once you have attained it, nothing is impossible.”
 
 
 
Silence No More



 
 

Monday, April 28, 2014

A Wrinkle in Time: Staircases and Wardrobes of Wonder

An empty wardrobe sits in the basement, a staircase that leads up to an apartment, a few steps leading down to a wooden convent door, and yet another that leads to a childs IMAGINATION.
 
All of these I can think back and feel the sense of wonder, yet where has the wonder gone? I at times feel that I have lost that other sense of mine. It is somewhere inside. I can taste it, feel it, and even get a glimpse of it, within the corner of my eye, taunting me to follow, yet I soon shift to the here and now of all that needs done instead of following the magic.

Second star to the right and straight onto morning!
Did I forget to clap my hands?
I Believe.... I Believe!!! 
A baby laughs and a fairy is born, yet did the parent squish it?
When did my sense of Wonder grow tired and overcast?

A little upstairs apartment, residing in the "City of Magic" none the less, is where my Aunt Julie and Uncle Mark called home. Walking up those stairs into it's cozy interior opened the many doorways of my child mind. A couch under the window became the doorway to other worlds of adventure and magic. It was there that the box set would come down from the top shelf and the world of Narnia exploded. It was there that A Wrinkle in time and A Swiftly Tilting Planet stretched my mind into other worlds.

At the beginning of the book (A Wrinkle in Time) , Meg is a homely, awkward, but loving girl, troubled by personal insecurities and her concern for her father, who has been missing for over a year.
 
The three Mrs. W's transport the children to Camazotz and instruct them to remain always in each other's company while on their quest for Mr. Murry. On Camazotz, all objects and places appear exactly alike because the whole planet must conform to the terrifying rhythmic pulsation of IT, a giant disembodied brain.
 
In the end, Mrs. Which tells her that she has one thing that IT does not have, and this will be her weapon against the evil. However, Meg must discover this weapon for herself. When standing in the presence of IT, Meg realizes what this is: her ability to love. Thus, by concentrating on her love for Charles Wallace, she is able to restore him to his true identity.  . The family joyously reunites.
*taken from sparknotes: http://www.sparknotes.com/lit/wrinkle/summary.html


I could relate to Meg. I felt homely, insecure, and weak at times. I didn't deal well with the divorce of my parents at such a young age. A Wrinkle in Time took me to a place that if I could only LOVE hard enough maybe my family would be joyously reunited. That wasn't the case, yet I could Wish on the Star and Believe.  Growing up I, like Meg, would run from the Terrifying IT. I would not conform to your rhythmic pulses. I have my own drum!

Have I become IT with my own children? At times I see the terrifying IT come out to play, yet maybe then is when I need to bring out the drums. Remind my body of it's unique rhythm and allow my children to march to their own tune.

My Aunt Julie gifted me with my own set of The Chronicles of Narnia and my Uncle Mark was the music in my mind while reading those books. He would walk through buildings and make harmonic sounds, he could pick up any instrument and play it. I loved listening to him just sit and play his guitar. The Faun of Narnia he was with a head of hair to match.
 
Try to tell me different. This is one enchanting couple!
 
 
 My Aunt Julie was always this beacon of light. She had a spinning wheel that sat in the corner of her apartment. I was taught how to comb the wool and spin it into yarn, yet when I spun it became yarn of gold and Rumplestiltskin was keeping me company.

Outside we could walk down the stairs and over the black lake of asphalt to a lonely wooden door. There is where three little girls would knock and from that knock two little nuns, adorned in their habits, would appear. "Please can we play with your ball?" They would smile and present the Red Rubber Ball from behind their robes granting us hours of play.

After awhile the knock was not needed. They would just be there waiting with the ball and a smile. I wonder if they looked forward to those three little girls knocking on the back convent door. Did they miss us when we no longer appeared?
Those little nuns were mysterious, magical and kind in the eyes of one little girl. I wish I could return to thank them again for the joy and wonder they brought to my days of littledom.

My kingdom of Littledom is fighting the IT. To not force the IT on myself or my children. At times it is a struggle and I feel as if I am going to split, yet below I will hold this vision and remember the little girl and remind her to keep clapping and BELIEVE.




Thursday, April 24, 2014

Revisiting a Layer

This is my very first Blog I have ever written. This is a journey for myself into my Art of Life Peeling. To always skin off the surface and seek what is true.

I will take this peel way back to the age of 5 or 6

You see there was this one Christmas....

                                                           

  An Amy Bags Christmas



Army had traveled far carrying many a loads. Loads for Strength, Hunger and Survival.
Through the dense jungles he struggled under the weight of lonliness and despair.
 Never did Army think he would be the bearer of a load so precious ~ Gifts.
Gifts to a little girl on a cold December morning.
 



Army was carried through the side door that day.
 
 
There she was ~ a little girl sitting in her pajamas. She turned in amazement and stood up reaching out to receive her biggest gift of the day.
Struggling to wrap her arms around to pull this gift into the room.
 
 
For you see
it wasn't the gifts within the bag that brought joy to the little girls eyes.
The Gift was the one who carried it's weight through the side door that wintery day.
 
 
The little girl looked her Gift in the eyes and said
"Merry Christmas Daddy - I Love You!"
 
 
 
 
 
 
This was a gift I made for my Father for Christmas 2011 and yes... Those pictures of the little girl is me and the last one of myself and my Dad.